Cross My Heart Ministry

Kindness falls right in the middle of the list of the nine traits of the Spirit. As I write out and read over verses that have the word kindness (or in some cases, lovingkindess), it seems there is almost always an action included. Kindness is more than something we feel; it’s something we do.  

In Job 6:14 we read this: 

Anyone who withholds kindness from a friend
forsakes the fear of the Almighty.

Do those words give you pause as they do me? Do you find them sobering? We often speak of sharing “random acts of kindness” as a way to make ourselves — as well as the recipient — feel good. A fine thing when we do it, but no consequences when we don’t.

This passage from Job forces us to consider that choosing not to release kindness is serious business.  

Holy reverence for the almighty God should prompt followers of Christ to release kindness when it is within our ability to do so. To be kind is to just simply be nice. (And Christians sometimes are anything but nice.) 

Where — and from whom — are we holding out? And why are we holding out?  

• Do we use our full plate of commitments and responsibilities as an excuse to shirk the opportunity to release kindness? 
• Do we deem the person before us as unworthy of our time or resources?
• Do I dismiss the opportunity as “not my job?” 
• Are we just too selfish to be interrupted? 

The sobering words of Job pierce my heart. They make me realize that I’m not simply protecting my schedule or resources; instead, I’m forsaking the fear of God.  

What comes to mind when you read “fear of the Almighty?” Perhaps we tend to soften the “fear factor” where God is concerned. In our Western world, many modern-day believers are reluctant to portray God as fearsome. Maybe it’s much more comfortable to visualize Him as a doting grandfather. We sometimes want to see Him only as a God of love, and forget He is also a God of righteousness. He is to be feared: to be respected, revered, bowed to, and obeyed.  

As I examine my own heart, I am challenged to ask: Do I take God seriously? Do I take my walk with Him seriously? Do I take His Word seriously? Does fear of God (and love of God) prompt me to release acts of kindness when it is within my ability to do so … or perhaps even outside my ability, but possible for God? 

Job specifically mentions kindness to a friend. Releasing kindness to a friend should be an easy decision … pleasant assignment. Can we ask God to give us an opportunity to live this out? 

Our choice to release kindness not only strengthens our bonds of friendship with the one we choose to bless, it also exhibits a holy fear of our great God. He is the One who, in providing our salvation, showed the greatest kindness of all.  

Will you choose to ask God for a kindness assignment, then look for the open door of opportunity and walk on through? 

These cool fall days may find you picking apples at a local orchard. We also hope it finds you reading, writing, and studying about fruit — the Fruit of the Spirit, that is!

There are NINE different traits that Galatians 5 identifies as Fruit of the Spirit. During October, we’ve written out verses about the first four: love, joy, peace, and patience. We will complete our study of the remaining five traits in November, and we invite you to join us! We hope you’ll enjoy our most recent teaching video, featuring Laura’s introduction of the upcoming month’s study:

Find this month’s Fruit of the Spirit, Part II bookmark and S.O.A.P. Bible study pages on our Downloads page.

Paul’s letter to the Colossians included reassurance that he was praying for them: 

…we have not stopped praying for you
and asking God to fill you with the knowledge of his will
through all spiritual wisdom and understanding.
Colossians 1:9

The ensuing verses (please read verses 10-12) give details of Paul’s specific prayers on behalf of the Colossian believers. His list is peppered with athletic terms: 

• Strength 
• Endurance 
• Qualify 

These words spur thoughts of an Olympic hopeful—persevering, working hard, training, sacrificing—all for the goal of representing his or her country on that big day. 

As followers of Christ, we also persevere, hone our strength, practice patience and endurance … but we are not simply hoping to qualify. Because of Jesus, we know we are already qualified. What a blessing!

Knowing our end, how does it change our journey? Does it make us lazy and complacent? Grateful and joyful?  

Paul challenges us to live a life worthy of our qualification. We don’t work to please God to EARN our place in heaven; we do it in GRATITUDE for our qualification. It is our response to the inheritance we have in Him.  

He has given us the power to endure. It comes from the Holy Spirit and cannot be manufactured by us. We are not “good-works machines,” cranking out works widgets to justify ourselves. We are children of God, adopted by Him and grafted into His family for eternity. 

Our qualification/adoption means we can live loved—free from a duty to perform, and from striving to earn what Jesus gave freely. Our have-to transforms into a want-to and eventually a joyful, thankful delight-to, as God’s love becomes the motivation for what and how we live our lives.  

We desire and delight to “please Him in every way.” For a woman of God, that is lived out by patiently and faithfully listening, loving, preparing, disciplining, and encouraging the precious ones God has placed in our sphere of influence. 

Even when—especially when—they are not grateful.

Even when—especially when—we see no progress.

Even when—especially when—we get no performance review, raise or bonus rewarding our effort.

We patiently, faithfully serve today for a result we may not see tomorrow or next week. In fact, it may be 15, 20, or 30 years (or perhaps not even this side of heaven) when the fruit of our labor appears. We simply commit to doing our part, and trust God will do His. 

As we live this life, remaining faithful to give and serve and stay the course He has laid out for us, the primary result is: God is glorified. Paul says we “please him in every way.” Does pleasing God make our daily to-do list? Does it ever occur to us—as we are working, studying, scrubbing, baking, caring, planning, listening, forgiving, releasing—that God sees, God knows, and God is pleased? 

Not only does our faithfulness bring glory to God, it brings us transformation. 

Just as a faithful athlete is rewarded with stronger muscles, faster speed, greater endurance, so the child of God grows and advances spiritually. As we yield to the moving and leading of His Spirit abiding in us, we find ourselves “bearing fruit in every good work” and “growing in knowledge of God” (verse 10). This growth, of course, comes from the Holy Spirit. We cannot produce it on our own. We cooperate with Him, surrender and yield to His leading, and the resulting blessings are evidence of a transformed life (verses 11-12): 

• Strengthened with all power 
• Great endurance 
• Patience 
• Joyful thanks 

An athlete might consult the time clock to assess his progress. There is no stopwatch for our spiritual assessment, but we can ask ourselves:  

• How have I yielded my way to His way today? 
• Can I think of a specific situation where I said, “Yes, Sir!” to the Holy Spirit’s prompting? 
• Am I more naturally patient than when I began this journey? 
• Does joyful thanks to God abound in my home and in my heart?  

The Holy Spirit will release the power God has already instilled in me, as I choose to cooperate with Him. My choice is to do it Laura’s hard-work way (often characterized by frustration and impatience) or His easy way, prompted and empowered by the Spirit and characterized by endurance and patience.  

Patience, of course, is one of the nine traits of the Spirit’s work in us, the fruit growing from the moment of salvation as we are progressively sanctified. A pause in life’s journey reveals, amazingly, that I truly am more patient that when I launched this journey in Him. I’m not who I used to be. (And, praise God, I’m not yet who I’m gonna be!) Yielding to Him is bringing transformation … a realization that prompts joyful praise to the One who makes it all possible. 

Patience is truly one of the nine indicators of a transformed life.

This week’s Bible study teaching lecture featured Angela Kincade, Ministry Assistant at Cross Church. We invite you to listen and prayerfully consider Angela’s challenge to “widen our hearts” (II Corinthians 6:11-13). And please don’t miss her powerful questions for self examination at the end of the video!

There’s just over a week remaining in our October study of the Fruit of the Spirit … but we will be continuing in November! Subscribe to our YouTube channel and the Cross My Heart Ministry email newsletter to be notified when we release our free bookmark and S.O.A.P. study pages for Write the WORD: Fruit of the Spirit, Part II.

Peace is the third of the nine traits describing the fruit of the Spirit.

The Apostle Paul invoked two qualities that appealed to Gentile and Jewish readers (respectively) when he opened each of his letters with some variation of the greeting, “Grace and peace to you.” But how are we, today, to understand peace?

What It Is 

It’s a steadfast mind (Isaiah 26:3). Abiding in His presence brings freedom and serenity on the inside, regardless of what’s happening on the outside.  

We are reassured by the words of Isaiah, 

You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast,
because they trust in you.

What It’s Not 

A careful reading of our Write the Word verses also prompts some thoughts on what peace is NOT.  

Jesus shared in John 16:33, 

“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace.
In this world you will have trouble.
But take heart! I have overcome the world.”

From His words, we can conclude that trouble is the opposite of peace. We know that to be true. Today’s trouble may be an alarm that didn’t go off, an overdue bill, a rebellious child, or a malignancy. It may be practical, financial, relational, or medical. But we can wholeheartedly agree that trouble is never peaceful. 

Paul reminds us in I Corinthians 14:33, 

For God is not a God of disorder but of peace…

Though the context here is speaking and interpretatiing tongues in worship, every woman I know would absolutely agree that disorder in our homes robs us of our peace.

How to Get It 

Salvation ushers in eternal peace. Our sin puts us at war with God; faith in Jesus brings us peace: 

Therefore, since we have been justified through faith,
we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ…
Romans 5:1

To know Jesus is to know peace. When there is no Jesus, there is no real peace.  

Even after salvation, we must continue seeking after Jesus if we desire peace in all things. We may get distracted by life’s challenges. We may look for temporary escape by chasing after new shoes, a nice vacation, or a box of chocolate – but none of it brings the peace our hearts crave. Paul told us it wouldn’t: 

For the kingdom of God is not a matter of eating and drinking,
but of righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy Spirit…
Romans 14:17

When life happens, when you are blindsided by trouble or disorder, look to Paul’s recipe for peace: 

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation,
by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.
And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding,
will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:6-7

I like to call this the “trade up” verse: we give Him the anxiety and the worry, and in exchange we get His peace. When you trade with God, you always trade up!  

From a human perspective, this peace makes no logical sense. It’s something the world cannot manufacture and cannot even understand. It comes only from Him. And when God blesses us with His peace, it becomes our own personal spiritual “force field’ to stand guard over our hearts and our minds, where we are most vulnerable to fear and anxiety.  

Are your circumstances today anything but peaceful? Do you long for peace in your home, your life, and your heart? Will you take time – make time – to draw near to Jesus, your Prince of Peace? 

Our identity in Christ makes us a new creation, no longer defined by our old ways. We invite you to listen to this week’s teaching video, as Laura shares what it means to live as an ambassador for Christ, compelled/constrained/controlled by His love.

We hope you’ll join us for the second half of October, as we read, write, and meditate on the fruit of the Spirit. Visit our Downloads page today for your copy of our free Write the WORD bookmark (and optional S.O.A.P. study pages).

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy…
Galatians 5:22

Joy is number two on the Holy Spirit’s top nine list.  We often use “joy” and “happy” interchangeably, but they are vastly different:

• Happy is temporary; joy is eternal.
• Happy is circumstance dependent; joy transcends circumstances.
• Happy can be baked, bought, and driven; joy only comes from the Holy Spirit.

Nothing wrong with an apple pie, new pair of shoes, or shiny sports car. But those things are temporary. The new car smell fades, the apple pie is eaten (or gets buried in the fridge and goes bad), and I inevitably wear the heels off my new shoes. We can appreciate and enjoy good things, but we don’t need to settle for them. As women of God, there is more – so much more!

When we chase after joy, we need not be held hostage by our emotions. An overdue bill can’t rob us of joy, and we can stay out of the ring when angry people or defiant children want to go twelve rounds.

Joy calms our spirits in a way that can only come from the Holy Spirit.

If you are writing along with us this October and November, you’ll encounter some familiar verses on joy – but taking the time to write them out and think them through prompts contemplation and consideration.

Come, let us sing for joy to the LORD;
let us shout aloud to the Rock of our salvation.
Psalm 95:1

Our salvation is cause for great joy. No matter how long we have known Jesus, our identity in Him should prompt grateful praise and shouts of joy. Have you taken time this week (month? year?) to be amazed again that the creator of the universe loves you and died for you?

Your statutes are my heritage forever;
they are the joy of my heart.
Psalm 119:111

What a blessing to see His statues not as rules to be kept, but blessings to be enjoyed. Our sanctification brings this transformative thinking.

As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you.
Now remain in my love.
If you keep my commands, you will remain in my love,
just as I have kept my Father’s commands
and remain in his love.
I have told you this so that my joy may be in you
and that your joy may be complete.
John 15:9-11

Do you see how love dovetails with joy? As we abide in God’s love, choosing to keep His commands is a natural result. We live in that sweet spot of want to, letting go of the have to. Our heavenly Father knows that obedience to Him releases the blessing of complete joy in our lives.

You have made known to me the paths of life;
you will fill me with joy in your presence.
Acts 2:28

Nothing else satisfies like the blessed assurance that comes from being in His presence. Joy!

May the God of hope fill you
with all joy and peace as you trust in him,
so that you may overflow with hope
by the power of the Holy Spirit.
Romans 15:13

The more we abide in Him, the more peace and joy begin to define us. We live on earth with an eye toward heaven. A daily awareness that my true identity is in Him and my true citizenship is in heaven brings a heart overflowing with hope.

I have no greater joy than to hear
that my children are walking in the truth.
III John 4

I’ve often used this verse to declare praise to God when I see my children (and grandchildren) making godly choices. But perhaps it also represents God’s own joy when He sees us as His children walking the light of His truth. Are we giving Him great joy with our actions, attitudes, thoughts and behaviors today?

Are you ready to set your sights higher than happy … and allow JOY to fill you?

Don’t forget to download this month’s Write the WORD bookmark
& begin writing along with us as we explore what Scripture tells us
about the Fruit of the Spirit.

In this week’s teaching video, Mollie Duddleston from Cross Church shared this important message: Do not lose heart, because God’s glory is at stake! We invite you to watch as Molly reminds us of this truth from God’s Word.

And so we know and rely on the love God has for us.
God is love.
Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in them.
I John 4:16

What does it look like to “live in love” … and how does that help us “live in God?”

Is it significant that love is the very first trait listed when Paul described the fruit of the Spirit in Galatians 5:22?  

So many questions begin swirling when we ponder that word, love. In our before-Jesus life, we might have described it like a passionate teenager or an excitable child: I love pizza! I love music! I love Minecraft! But as we grow in Christ, we come to realize it is much more than a feeling, and requires more than an emotional response.  

Love is often a choice. A commitment. When you and I choose to live in love, we are living in God. The result of doing so? We’ll be faced with some decisions that require self-sacrifice.

If the Spirit is producing fruit in my life, I may be prompted to: 

• Change my schedule.
  Today may be laundry day, but instead I may choose to have coffee with a hurting friend.
• Study my family.
  My child may need a little one-on-one time. Instead of pushing her to do Algebra homework or clean her room, maybe I need to take her out for ice cream. And how long has it been since you’ve set aside your to-do list in favor of a date night with your hubby?
• Reconsider my commitments.
  Have I filled my schedule with so many obligations, there’s no time to lovingly respond when needs arise with friends, neighbors, or my church family? Leaving time in our schedule provides flexibility to be available.
• Pray over my motivations.
  Have I signed up to do things out of guilt or obligation, rather than a Spirit-led prompting to obedience?
• Have some difficult conversations.
  In our roles as parents, grandparents, friends, leaders, teachers, or mentors, living in love might call for accountability, discipline, and correction. Galatians 6:1 prompts us to restore one another gently.
• Make abiding in Him a daily priority.
  If  I’m living in God, it is imperative to live in His Word. He must fill me up so I can be ready to pour out.
• Die to myself.
  John 15:13 tells us there is no greater demonstration of love than to lay down one’s life.  We may not be called to die physically, but at some point, every woman — whether a wife, mother, aunt, grandmother, daughter, granddaughter, sister, or friend — will be called to die to herself spiritually, mentally, or emotionally. It’s a sign of maturity when we choose to do so.  

As we grow and mature in Christ, love will begin to lead out, prompting changes in our words, attitudes, actions, motivations, and behaviors. Yielding more and more to God gives us both peace and purpose. Love begins to flow forth, transforming even our “good” moments (kind words, agreeable thoughts, virtuous acts) into something more: the natural result of living in God. 

Are you living in God and in His love … or just camping out there occasionally?

How is God prompting you to live in love today?

Would you like to read and study along with us?
Visit our Downloads page for your own copy of our October bookmark…
and don’t forget the printable S.O.A.P. study guide!

When you see red, luscious fruit hanging from the branch, you know you’re looking at an apple tree. The same is true for peaches and every other fruit-producing plant. And, as followers of Jesus with the Spirit dwelling in us, the Fruit of the Spirit should also be evident in our lives.

This fall, we’ll be focusing on the nine traits that the apostle Paul identified as evidence of the Spirit’s influence in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, , gentleness, and self-control. During October and November, we’ll be writing out six verses for each of these nine traits.

As you write, we encourage you to prayerfully consider how the Holy Spirit is helping you to grow and mature in each of these areas. We invite you to watch this week’s devotional video, as Laura introduces our October bookmark, with its focus on the Fruit of the Spirit.

As iron sharpens iron,
so one person sharpens another.
Proverbs 27:17

The expression “peer pressure” certainly carries a negative connotation. Secular and non-secular studies alike have confirmed the impact (particularly during adolescence) of peers. Teenagers, when influenced by their friends, are far more vulnerable to substance abuse, reckless behavior, bullying, and a host of other things that are potentially life-altering.  

As conscientious Christian parents and grandparents, we may try to postpone the timing of those influences … but please don’t ever assume you can avoid them altogether. And please don’t assume that another teen is godly, simply because he or she was raised in a godly family (to the best of your knowledge).  

When children are young, the adults in their lives control their relationships. We choose who they play with, what they do, and where they go. And to a certain extent—especially when the adults are very engaged with the kids—that can continue into adolescence.

But at some point, we need to hand them the reins. Only parents can decide when is the right time for that to happen. It will be a decision not only unique to each family, but perhaps to each child.  

If we are devoted to teaching and training their hearts, our focus will be to prepare them to make good choices for themselves and help them understand how they can do that. It’s easy to build high walls and keep them in place until a child turns 18 … but what happens then?  

As a mother of four adults, I’m a long-time advocate of communication early on. Ask your children and grandchildren what makes a good friend. Role play with questions like, “What would you do if ___?” Using “worst case scenario” tools, empower them for as many situations as you can imagine. Explain some of your own poor choices (or those you have witnessed in others) as a warning. Pray. Talk. Share.  

We must prepare the children in our sphere of influence to make wise choices in friends. We must also challenge them to be a positive influence upon others.

Here are a few questions that come to mind for discussion with the children you love: 

1. What qualities make for a good friend? 
2. Who is your best friend and why? 
3. What would you do if a friend wanted you to watch or do something that made you feel uncomfortable? 
4. What did Joseph do when he was in an uncomfortable situation? (See Genesis 39) 
5. Did I ever tell you about the time …? 

Each passing year is one less we have to be a daily, primary influence upon these young souls that God has placed in our lives. Ultimately, we hope and pray it is the voice of the Holy Spirit they choose to heed above all. But we know that peers will also influence their lives, attitudes, and behaviors.

If they choose well, peer pressure can be a profoundly positive influence in the life of a child.  

Lord, I pray for my children and grandchildren, and for their friends.
I pray You would raise up a generation of Christ followers
who love You and love Your Word.
I pray the children in my life would choose their confidants well.
I pray You would hedge them in from the wrong friends
and steer them to those who will be a positive influence –
that they would mutually encourage each other to live for You,
always and in all ways.
May iron sharpen iron in all their relationships.
Amen.

In this week’s II Corinthians study, Laura shares thoughts on forgiveness (inspired by II Corinthians 2: 5-11). We invite you to watch this week’s devotional video, in which she asks three questions:

1. What is forgiveness?
2. Why should we forgive?
3. How can we forgive?

We hope Laura’s teaching on this passage will be a blessing on your life.

We hope you will listen to this week’s video, pray over the content, and then humbly ask the Lord who He is calling you to forgive. It takes courage to ask God for a forgiveness assignment … just as we’ll need the power of the Holy Spirit to follow through when He answers.

You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart,
with all your soul,
and with all your strength.
Deuteronomy 6:5

Jesus said to him, “‘You shall love the Lord your God with
all your heart,
with all your soul, and
with all your mind.’
Matthew 22:37

 All means ALL!

When we pray that the children in our lives would love God wholeheartedly, it means ALL IN. Not half-way, not half-heartedly, and not Sundays only.

When a mama asks her teenager to take out the trash, she doesn’t expect to see the trash sitting by the front door. It must make it all the way to the curb.

When a wife wants a faithful husband, she doesn’t mean 364 days a year – she expects 365 (and some years 366)!

And when God commands us to love Him with ALL our heart, soul, mind, and strength, we need to apply the same high standard. ALL IN!

As we pray for the children in our sphere of influence to love God wholeheartedly, we can also ask God to reveal where we ourselves might be holding out.

Here are some questions we can ask as we pray for the children in our lives (and for ourselves):

• Do I have a divided heart? Is there anything I treasure more than God?
• Do I find myself praying without ceasing – having on ongoing conversation with God throughout my day?
• Does God enter my thought life on Tuesday morning or Friday afternoon?
• Do I ask God about what I buy, read, and watch?
• Has Sunday morning worship become an optional activity? Am I finding reasons (I don’t feel like braving the rain, there’s a mountain of dirty laundry, I’m in the middle of a great book and can’t wait to finish it) not to gather with other believers?
• Do I give God the first and best of each day?
• Do I speak up when others speak poorly of my God?
• Do my posts, tweets, and social media comments indict me as a woman of God?
• Do thoughts about God in my mind and heart make their way into my conversations with others?

I hope one or more of these questions convict you as they do me. Perhaps they could even prompt a loving-God-wholeheartedly conversation with your child, grandchild, nephew or niece, a student in your class or church, or a young person in your neighborhood.

Lord God, I pray this child would put You on the throne of his/her life each day and every day. I pray this would be deliberate, conscious, daily choice.  I pray he/she would love You most and best and with a wholehearted devotion.

In this week’s teaching lecture from our II Corinthians Bible study, Laura drilled down on II Corinthians 1:3-11, with a focus on suffering. As believers, we will encounter difficult circumstances. And when we do, we may struggle with hard question: Does God see my pain? Does He care? Why doesn’t He stop my suffering — or simply prevent it in the first place?

As you watch this week’s devotional, we pray you are encouraged as you consider how our great God can use the suffering we experience for our benefit.

If you live in Northwest Arkansas or Northeast Oklahoma, we invite you to join our in-person Bible study on Wednesday mornings in Siloam Springs, AR. Reach out through our Contact form for more information about how you can gather with us this fall!